The idea for this blog has been on my heart for quite some time. But with anything else that feels exposing or extra vulnerable, I put it off.
But I'm here now, and I'm ready. So let's start at the beginning...
I was sat in front of the TV one evening about 8 months ago, grappling with feelings that no one knew about. Not because they didn't try to know. But because I hide so much of my real life and feelings from people. I realized I don't talk to anyone about some of these things because it requires me to admit some negative shit about myself -- and there's just so much that I just don't want to admit. To myself, to my family, to my friends, and sure as hell not to the public.
This realization sparked something in me. I started writing down a list of things that I am currently struggling with or have struggled with in the past that feel too scary or embarrassing to admit (which I'll say turned into an effortlessly long list) and I found myself thinking, "why isn't anyone talking about all of this? Surely I'm not the only one with this shit going on." And the idea for a blog was born. Even though I've never considered myself a writer.
So here we are. A blog written by a non-writer. About some real shit. That I hope you all can relate to on some level.
I want this to be a place of honesty, vulnerability, and authenticity. I'm sure the criticism will come, but that's inevitable and part of any journey. I can't let that stop me from opening up and MAYBE helping one person feel heard or understood. Consider this your warning: I can be crude and I also swear/curse, especially when I feel passionate or riled up about something. You won't find me filtering myself here, that's not the point of this blog.
I'll tell you right off the bat, this will be a work in progress. I have no idea or rules on how often I'll write or where I'll find inspiration. I want this to feel like something that I can use as an escape, and I know myself well enough to know that when it starts to feel like a pain in the ass, I'll quit doing it. Also, on that note, I'm not about to go and take a bunch of beautiful pictures of myself, my city, etc. to slather on this blog. In an effort to reduce overwhelm and avoid the pain in the ass thing mentioned above, you'll be seeing lots of Wix stock photos. Whew, I'm glad I got that off my chest. So welcome, and bear with me here. Please be patient and accepting, I hope it'll be worth it.